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More of My Work Here

I Wiggle my Tweets at You…

  • Tokyo’s hypothetical betting shop. You have £1000 and you have to put that money on a 50-1, 50/50 bet. Come back on… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 10 minutes ago
  • Am I the only person who wishes that when the Joker is dancing down those stairs he gets hit by the priest from The Exorcist? 57 minutes ago
  • Halloween is just around the corner and I’ve already got the kids carving pumpkins on human faces. 1 hour ago
  • All I’m thinking when I bring a library book back, ‘See? You trusted me and I didn’t steal it.’ 1 hour ago
  • Actually, Big Ben is the name of the bell but the actual tower is called Frankenstein, after the monster. 1 hour ago
  • So we’ve loaded the gun, we’re just taking our time shooting ourselves in the head. 13 hours ago
  • RT @KnitwitMoonbeam: We have three of @tokyo_sexwhale’s finest stormtroopers on our living room wall, and Ruby has been fascinated with the… 14 hours ago

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